this entries shall be abit personal so im sorry if any thing that i've mention offended you in one way or another.
in about 21days, a new year begins and everything is history. looking back, i realised we've all changed beyond comprehension. when i first stepped into xinmin, i felt weird, like a whole new place with new people and all. and then i got to sit with a really nice girl, huishi. she was really sweet and outspoken and over time, i got closer to many others like njl, haiza, xi quan and huishi herself. until our CCA selection, when we were having selection for volleyball, i got to know jasmine, wendy, cindy and cris. since then, i gradually bonded better with jasmine wendy cindy and cris. i remember those days this group of girls dislike jiale's group. then slowly things start to change, friends falling out, me and cris argued bad and being friends was out of the point. and at that tym i was with shawn. haha. then slowly, our class mixed around and i found myself group with 9 other people. jasmine, jiale, weirou, dwayne, garey, freddy, haiza, christopher, yiwei. and we had alot of fun together, then it was the june hols. i went vietnam and a couple of days after a got back, i broke up with shawn over stupid reasons. i cant rmb but i think it was barely 5 months or so. then life was back to normal again, things were good and my clique was still pretty close. and before i knew it, people start to change. they did things that i would nvr expect them to, all in the name of fun. and at the end of august or so, i got to know samuel through roger. i rmb the whole group of guys was outside my class. o.o then the first tym i saw samuel was when i was having chinese lesson and roger went to see me while samuel followed behind him. then as tym pass, my studies dropped tremendously. i dont know why. maybe cos i thought that as long as i pass and get promoted, its gonna be fine. then after samuel's n lvl's, we got together. and when i was studying for my science end years he came to look for me. [haha i know i mentioned this many tyms before, whatever.] then soon my results were out. i was feeling really guilty, so i apologise to my dad who was overseas that tym. i told him i was sorry and i didnt live up to his expectations, that i lost focus. and the next thing i knew, he fly back to sg the very next day or so. then school ended nicely. i started working for fun as a door-to-door ice cream, darn it was a great experience i tell you. cross my heart. i rmb there was this tym i was harrassed by a bunch of ahbengs and they refused to back off, then samuel came into the picture. haha, in fairytales they call it a white knight in shining armour. HAHAHA. then slowly i quit and worked for breadtalk cos samuel and my family told me that its not safe for me to come home pass 12 every night at my ulu estate that even if i screamed my guts out, nobody could hear-.- then problems start to arise in my relationship, among friends. i couldnt believe that this is what we've come to. friends that used to be so close, shared every secret now hated each other like there's no tomorrow, people all becoming so hypocritical, one minute you said A is such a arse and the next minute you go to A and tell himn/her that he/she is such a great friend. and yes, i dont deny that this happens to each and EVERY one of us. then the relationship that used to be strong and full of sweet sugary stuff became so vulnerable and fragile, that just a poke and everything could collapse. i curse and swear and got mad at everything and anything. but i refuse to let myself to continue sinking and become such a person. and then i went off to bangkok. came back and made a decision, me and sam went on seperate ways for the better i guess. and now im here.
afterall, i do have some little shoutouts to those who beared with me this year.
ANGIE. i know im such a bitch at tyms and we couldnt stand each other but somehow, we managed to stay reallyreally good friends for 3 whole years, shared everything, laugh together, cried together. the bond between us is beyong words, like nothing i could ever describe. without her to pass thru all the tyms in my life, i guess i would have suffered a breakdown or something. but whatever it is, i wont forget you sweetie(:
ROGER. haha, i cant rmb how we first knew eacjh other, but i rmb him telling me that he teased me before in school -.- idiot. my ro- partner! we were really close somehow then things happened and everything went downside but then we became just like how we were once again. (: also, he was my outlet to everything and anything. my best(:
MARCUS. meatballlllll~~~ i rmb first tym talking to him on the phone he was telling me about his experiences with renyi and the rest ahaha, i was laughing away la! we chat thru msn till morning or something, then we were really close and all, until now things are going fine(:
JASMINE we wanted to join shooting together but both ended up in dance. haha, i rmb start of the year we were on bad terms and all, but slowly we bonded and many things happened. i still rmb last tym i spilled mango ice blend in my NUM bag and we had no tissue whatsoever then we both looked at each other and laughed-.- , haha! because we both thought of using pads to dry my bag-.- LOL! haha, we're still close now and it wont change(:
JIALE haha, crazy one laaaaaaa. borny little pervert who always go ' you have a nice ass.' -.- LOL. shall not continue further.
SAMUEL last night i reflected of some sort. i went back to the first day we saw each other and every single day that i spent with him. at the beginning i was smiling , as i rmb msges and things that happened. he treated me like a princess and whenever i had problems he silently tried to help w/o my acknowledgement. all and everything that he said/done made me feel like i was the happiest girl living. then as i continued with the story, i started to tear. as tym went by, everybody changes and its nobody's fault. problems arose. i knew what was going on but i didnt want to worsen things. i dont deny that i was angry at some point of time. i was furious, to be exact. but im glad we talked things out in the end and settle with such a decision that the best, or i hope it was, for us. whatever it is, thank you for everything. we'll still be very good friends alright, and whenever you need me, feel down or wanto confide in, i swear that like a shadow by your side, i'll be there. (:
alright i know alot of people are worried about me because of the break up but im more of a optimist and when i do think back, i usually think of happy memories. but to avoid confusion that i couldnt 'put things down' [direct translation from chinese], i wont be posting things about him any more. (: and if you do read this, nono, im not indirectly saying anything, i just dont like people to worry bout me thats all.
its late and im gonna sleep alr. goodnight all! (:
